January, Week 3.

This blog post is a little late, but that's okay. I still want to make sure I document everything. These pictures are from Saturday. I weigh in every Saturday, no matter what. It's important to be held accountable, and I decided when I started WW, I would never miss a weigh in. I had one where I gained 4.4 pounds, but I took it and moved on. Awareness is so important throughout the journey.

Last week I lost 1 pound. I was hoping for more (the story of my life) because I had a really good eating week, but I have learned two important lessons through this journey.
1. Learn to be content with small but consistent weight loss.
2. Weight that comes off slower and more consistently will not jump back on. Before, I would have a big loss, then eat a burger, and gain it all back. I realized that as I lose weight slowly, it is easier to keep off. Plus, because it sometimes took me a month to lose a few pounds, I was less likely to want to mess it up.

Including last week I have now lost 3.4 out of my year goal of 30 pounds. Right on track!

I am feeling very optimistic so far this year. Tim is so supportive, which makes a huge difference. And here is something I never thought I would say: I am starting to really enjoy cooking. I am still not very creative in the kitchen, and we usually rotate between 6 different meals. But I was in the kitchen the other day and I had music playing and I was chopping sweet potatoes and I realized, I felt so relaxed. Even though I had worked all day, I found making dinner to be so therapeutic and stress free. It was great! Plus, I can see exactly what I am putting into my body and count the points so much easier, which is great.

Words to live by.

I always thought it was important to have a mantra. Something you can repeat to yourself when times get hard in the weight loss journey. Because, let's be real, weight loss is hard. It's one of the hardest things I have ever done. And sometimes it's lonely and frustrating and awful. Sometimes it makes you want to punch your friend in the face as they eat a burger, or curse under your breath while you munch that salad. It can make you a mean person. So I find comfort in the words that keep me going. It can be something small someone at a WW meeting said in passing that will stick with me throughout the week. Or it can be a motivational picture I found on pinterest. Anything that motivates and inspires you is a good thing. These are some of my favorites. Not all of them directly relate to food or weight loss, but I think this whole journey is weaving in and out of every part of my life. So for me, it connects.

^ I can say it a million times. Weight loss is hard. There is no easy route, as much as some people will tell you. Some days you just have to be the person that works harder and gets shit done. It won't happen unless you work at it consistently. 

^ Raise your hand if you've said, "Oh, I can't possibly work out today. My head hurts." Or, "That burger is only 1,305 calories, come on!" And I know I'm not the only one that's used, "I'm not a morning person." At some point, you have to be stronger than the excuses. It hurts and sometimes it sucks but if you want something, the work is required. And it's worth it! 

^ It happens. Know that at some point, you will want to give up. I have a bad habit of not being able to follow through with things. I get bored easily and suddenly it's easier to find another task to focus on. I have given up more times than I can count on weight loss and healthy eating. The only time I started seeing real results was when I fought through that restless period and decided I was through giving up.

These are my favorites. Another one that I have in my office says, "Most people give up because they look at how far they have to go rather than how far they have come." I have lost 17.8 pounds. That's a larger number than ever before. I know I still have 50+ pounds to go, which seems daunting, so I don't focus on it. I try to focus on where I have come from and keep going every day.

January, Week 2

I have tried what feels like every diet/exercise routine to lose weight. I always remember overeating and having a problem maintaining my weight. It wasn't until I started Weight Watchers that I saw changes happening. Not only changes with my weight, but changes in my confidence. The bottom line is that the program works if you work it. I worked the program for 6 solid months last year (alongside therapy every week.) I lost a total of about 26 pounds, and I thought, this is it. I'm finally going to get to my goal weight and everything will be fine. Then, both of us got new jobs and we moved. I always underestimate how much changes affect me. It didn't seem like that big of a deal at the time, but my weight loss suffered. Soon, I would lose a little one week, just to gain it back the next week. Some weeks I didn't even follow the plan at all. I was frustrated in myself, and I didn't realize why I was losing control. Pair that with it being the holidays and suddenly I was putting a lot of the weight I had lost back on. However, I told myself at the beginning of this that I would not give up anymore. As long as it takes me, I will get to my goal weight. Along the way I hope to pick up new habits and tricks. I have no idea what this blog will turn into, but I missed writing, and I thought this outlet would be great to keep track with pictures.

It's a new year, the holidays are over, and I am feeling optimistic. I made it out of last year still maintaining a loss of about 15 pounds. I am happy with it because I know without a doubt if I hadn't joined WW, I would have gained 15 pounds or more. This year my goal is to lose 30 pounds. I thought about it a lot and feel that is a reasonable goal for myself.

This week my loss was 2.4. This is not an average weight loss, I feel it was a little inflated because I gained back weight last week (due to not counting my points in Portland.) This brings my total weight loss to 17.8.

I plan to take pictures every week to keep track of the changes. I only took pictures in the very beginning of my journey last year and I wish I had taken pictures along the way. Pictures (usually) don't lie. It will be good for me to have a visual of my journey.

Oh, the name of the blog. The name of this blog relates to a point our pastor brought up between the difference in happiness and joy. Happiness is often temporary and depends on circumstances. Joy is a mindset, a state of being, that doesn't change with circumstance or hardship. My middle name is Joy, yet I don't know that I have ever been a joyful person. A lot of my negativity in life has come from my weight and my lack of control over food. So I'm using WW, this blog, and therapy to try and learn to be a joyful person. It's less about weight loss and more about taking control of my life. I believe once I unravel what has made me so unhappy through the years, the weight will come off, and I will feel joy.